I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I am spending my child support on dildos
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
We left an ass print on the piano.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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