Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
