whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
