What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize
