You're my little dorito
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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