Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
