so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
my liver is dry heaving
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
