Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
