Whod you bang
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
