So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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