Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Randomize
