she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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