so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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