I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
