You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Mom said you looked used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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