when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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