No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
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i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
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I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
She has the best kind of daddy issues
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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