Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
