she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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