As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
