But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
