taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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