Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
