Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
