So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize