Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
