It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
