my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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