I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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