I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
operation harelip BJ is a go
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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