There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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