i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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