Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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