not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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