yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
