Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
