no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
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My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
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He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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