Fuck appropriateness.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
