so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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