You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
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There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
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I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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