You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize