What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
