Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
