i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
