Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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