He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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