Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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