How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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