New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great