You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
